Being a mum with ADHD is hard work. Not only are we running around trying to remember things for ourselves, trying to stay on track and get things done, we also have our children to think about. The task of parenting can be a challenge in itself. However, when you add in things like forgetfulness, disorganisation, problems focusing, restlessness, low tolerance, stress, overwhelm, anxiety and mood swings, to name a few, it can make life that bit harder.
I am far from an expert, but I am just like you. I’m a mum. I’m juggling motherhood, life, ADHD and work. So, to the mums out there juggling it all, here are some tips on how to live a peaceful and organised life with ADHD.
Use a planner
You may already have one – but are you really using it? Whether it’s paper-based or electronic, a planner can be life-changing. I prefer the electronic one myself because not only can I add my life into my electronic planner, I can also set up reminders and notifications. And when you connect it with a smartphone, when you suddenly think of something out and about, you can ask your phone to add things in for you! Use it for everything, home, work and me time. Make sure you plan in any social activities or downtime for you.
Plan in extra time
Whether its to get to an appointment or getting work done, allow some extra time either side. This gives you some buffer time if you’re running late, forget something or you overrun. It keeps you on schedule, or better yet, gives you some extra time to get ahead of yourself!
Have a brain dump
Brain dumps are a fantastic way to get rid of what’s in your head. Whether it’s writing down a to-do list of things you need to complete, writing a shopping list, getting rid of thoughts and feelings that no longer serve you. Write down everything currently going on in your head. Once it’s out of your head, you will have a clearer mind and will have gained some clarity. You can then choose how you want to deal with the things swimming around in your head too.
Sorting through paperwork and mountains of mail takes up time. And let’s be honest, do you really enjoy sifting and sorting through your mail!? Instead, go through and change what bills you can to paperless. Change your banking to online statements. Not only will this declutter the paper floating around at home, save you time in sorting and filing, but you will find it easier to find things by going to your online accounts instead!
Use the ‘touch it once’ principle
If you’ve not heard of the touch it once principle, the general idea is that any task, email, letter – anything you need to deal with comes through, you only handle it once. How often do you see a letter or email come through, start reading it, get distracted, bored and forget to go back to it? You then have to go back to it at another time. Or maybe you end up forgetting about something important. With the touch it once principle you take action straight away. You decide whether to Do, Delegate, Defer or Ditch/Delete. By using these principles, you will spend less time thinking and more time doing.
Set a deadline/time limit
It’s very easy for us to procrastinate over making decisions or tasks that we find uninteresting or boring. Setting a deadline or even a time limit can be a really useful way to speed up the process. Instead of agonising over what to do, the deadline or time limit will help to keep our focus and get things done.
Don’t over commit
We like to help people and help out where we can. Sometimes it becomes hard to say no and we end up over-committing ourselves.
We end up spreading ourselves too thinly.
So next time, instead of immediately saying yes, say that you’ll think about it. This gives you the opportunity to really decide before committing to more than you can handle.
Don’t forget about you
As mums, we spend a lot of time running around after our families, often forgetting about ourselves. But in order to look after others, we need to look after ourselves first. So, remember to take that time for you. You may feel selfish, but don’t forget, we can’t pour from an empty cup.
Do something for you.
Whether it’s going shopping, reading a book, taking a relaxing bath, or heading off to Yoga, do something you enjoy – just for you.
Now if you are a busy mum looking for ways to reduce your stress, anxiety and overwhelm, wanting to gain some calmness and clarity, whilst clearing your mind, increasing your focus and energy then you should sign up for The ADHD Mum’s Virtual Retreat. You can find out more by registering your interest here.
Or, if you want to take things a step further, why not sign up for your own assessment consultation. My sessions are designed to help you have better good days and more of them!. Sound good? Here is what one of my lovely clients had to say…
“Leah’s hypnotherapy sessions have helped to reduce my anxiety, helped me to understand it’s triggers and helped me understand how my ADHD and anxiety interact with each other.
Each hypnosis session left me feeling so calm and relaxed, even during really stressful weeks. The tools and techniques Leah suggested, including the hypnosis track she gave me to listen to between sessions, have helped reduce my anxiety and helped me sleep better. I’ve been able to focus my energy and time on other things and am generally happier and more positive as a result of these sessions.
Leah is very knowledgeable about ADHD and anxiety and the fact that she has ADHD herself means that she really understands what it is like to live with it; she really ‘gets’ the unique challenges that someone with ADHD faces.
It’s been really helpful to have this time each week dedicated to looking after myself and my own wellbeing. Leah has helped me to focus on my goals, what I want to improve and how to get there.” – Holly